New Resolutions for the New Year

Can you believe we are over half way through January?!  Over the last few years, I've gotten on board with making New Year's Resolutions.  Most of the resolutions I make are smaller things I want to accomplish that year - like making a quilt for example.  (I can't say I've completed that quite yet, but I think this year will be the year.)  I have been feeling for awhile like I need to get my priorities in order, so I'm working really hard to keep the resolutions I've made. 

I found an app called "Bible Study" and it's a 365 day plan to read the entire bible in chronological order.  I'm currently reading in Genesis (just finished Job), and I have to say, I don't want to stop at the end of my daily reading.  I'm learning so much.  I have a study bible and that makes a huge difference.  The little commentary at the bottom just makes what you've read more applicable to your life.  I try to get my reading done once I get Hayden and Allie to school, and Krissy & Austin have been fed.  I usually set out about 30 minutes to read and journal afterwards.  It's been a great thing to add to the start of my day, and really sets my mind/attitude for the rest of the day.  I've heard that said a thousand times, but didn't really realize how true it was until I saw for myself!

I also started a workout program at the beginning of January.  It's from BeachBody (21 day fix), and it's 30 minutes a day at home.  You focus on a different area of the body every 7 days, but then it repeats itself each week.  I'm really enjoying it, and already feeling better.  That first week, I was incredibly sore, and complained like a baby almost everyday - just ask Kevin.  I didn't weigh myself to begin, and I haven't weighed myself any other day.  I'm mentally at a point where I don't care what the number on the scale says, I just want to feel healthy and less jiggly.  My knees and hips pop like an 80 year old woman now, and I'm sure that will only get worse as I get older - also, we have a Florida trip planned for May and who wants to put on a swimsuit when you feel bleh?! So I'm prioritizing my health every day.

Lastly, Kevin and I are both working on keeping a budget.  Every month, for the last 4-5 years, I've made a monthly budget.  Just because I've made the budget, doesn't mean we've stuck to the budget.  Know what I mean? We set some financial goals, and are both working towards making them this year!

I don't know what your goals are for the year, but something I keep telling myself to hold me accountable is, "You don't get December results in January".  It takes a full year of reading/learning, a full year of making the choice to work out, a full year of watching how you spend your money to see real results.  Are you still going with your resolutions or have you already given up?

2016 Review

I'm completely overwhelmed when I look back at this past year ("Overwhelmed" is the song in my video below!).  It's been an absolutely great year where we've felt blessings poured over our family time after time.  Most of our smiles came from watching the kids play, listening to what they had to say (and they way they'd say it), or laughing at something they did.  We took time to relax, ate lots of snow cones, made time for date nights, and we played with all 16 of our pets.  When I think back over the past decade, I can't say any year compares to the joy we've experienced this year.  While there were a few bumps in the road, I just look back at the year with such a grateful heart.  Thank you 2016 for being so kind to us!

Things We Celebrated (sort of in chronological order):

Allie got glasses 

Girls attended the Father Daughter Dance

Hayden got baptized (2/13/16)

Started a new tradition of a special Valentines meal at home - cooked by me!

We added 5 new chickens to our flock 

I was able to make the girls Easter dresses and Easter baskets for all the kids

9 years of marriage

Allie lost her first tooth

Hayden turned 8

Austin got potty trained (we've been buying diapers for 8 straight years!)

Kevin built an amazing play house/outdoor fort for the kids 

We had our first outdoor clothes line that we actually used

We hung a hammock in the backyard

Kevin and I took our first "couples only" vacation since having kids

I made my first quilt top 

Allie turned 6 

We started getting blue eggs from our new chicks

Allie joined a little cheerleading group

Allie started kindergarten, Hayden started 2nd grade

Cute new lunchboxes for school

Hayden rejoined scouts and sold a ton of popcorn

Krissy turned 4

Krissy and Austin decided they really were friends

Krissy & Austin learned how to ride their bikes

Allie got baptized 11/26/16

We bunked all the kids in one room - best decision ever!

Kevin & I both turned 33 (Kevin's favorite number)

Austin turned 3

The Bumps in the Road:

We had 3 new black baby silkie chicks die

Austin got a bee sting in his foot

Austin stepped in hot ashes and got 2nd degree burns on his left foot

One of our chickens, Sunny, had her wing amputated

My last living grandparent passed away

My van broke down on the road and we were briefly stranded at a gas station

Krissy got a bee sting in her foot

Chicken problems like bumble foot and a lash egg

Countless temper tantrums and meltdowns (not just from the kids haha!) 

There were also arguments, sick kids and parents, money stress, me wishing I'd take better care of myself, and all those other real life problems

Clearly the good outweighs the bad though!

If you have 5 minutes, I made a video of pictures and video clips from the past year.  It's my favorite video I've made to date :)

We welcome 2017 with open arms! 

2016

I saw this image on my Instagram feed and thought it was the perfect way to make some New Years goals!

2016

this is the year

I Purpose To...

Embrace:  imperfect progress!  I just finished my book "Unglued" by Lysa Terkeurst and the books talks a lot about imperfect progress.  I'm one that tends to get discouraged when things aren't "perfect" but I'm learning perfect isn't attainable and imperfect progress + grace is a much better/healthier reality!

Engage:  intentionally.  Rejoin my women's group, set up play dates, go on dates and double dates.  I need to engage with people intentionally and not be full of excuses. 

Be: a better friend. Text more frequently, plan visits whenever possible, & have more breakfast and lunch dates.

Believe:  everyday is a new, fresh start.  This means not carrying the weight of yesterday with me.  Whether that's with healthy eating, keeping the house clean, or disciplining the kids.  I love the new year and the refreshment it brings, but I can have the same attitude everyday!  Woohoo!

Break:  the negative self talk.  This is something I really struggle with.  But I'm aware and have gotten better about it.  I try to redirect my thoughts with biblical truth.

Daily:  spend time with the Lord - reading my bible, watching old sermons, listening to Focus On The Family... It all helps keep life in focus.

Do:  more... reading, blogging, picture taking, crafting, budgeting, and menu planning - and only because I enjoy all those things (or the results of those things - like budgeting and menu planning!)

Let Go:  of people pleasing. Anyone else do this?  I say yes to people when I want to say no.  I don't speak up when I should.  So it's time to speak up, let go, be honest and move on. 

Learn:  to quilt. I need to start small but I don't have a habit of doing anything small. I love going all out. But I think that's why this has been on my yearly goal list for a couple years and I haven't been able to cross it off! 

Live:  in faith not fear.  We have an exciting year ahead of us (vacation, Allie starting school just to name a couple) and I don't want to let fear hold me back from experiencing the best!

Give:  up screen time for more face time... Especially while the kids are awake!  Just about everyone I know is guilty of spending too much time with their noses in their phones. And I'm no exception.  I want to be better about not keeping my phone attached to my hip all day, everyday, especially when interacting with family and friends.

Grow:  a savings account. We have plans to open a Christmas club account just to get the ball rolling on saving weekly.  A couple weeks ago we made some changes to our primary banking branch and we are refinancing our house.  I'm hoping these changes will be positive for our finances!

Highlights from 2015

I've complied a random list of highlights from our year! 

Kevin Promoted to "Point Person"

Kevin took a new job at the end of last year (still at Mead Johnson, just a different line).  He loved his old job but was ready for a change.  The new job was a bit overwhelming, we had several bad weeks, but like always, Kevin learned quickly and excelled on the line.  He was such a stand-out worker that just after a couple months on the new line, he was promoted to "Point Person".  The title means that when the manager is off work, he's the boss!  It came with a nice raise, and added responsibility that Kevin's really enjoying!  We wrapped up this year finding out the lady with more seniority on day shift retired, therefore giving up her point person position, so Kevin will be moving to day shift hopefully some time in February!

Trip East: Virginia, DC, New York
The girls were asked to be flower girls in one of my best friends wedding.  The wedding was over spring break, so we made a family trip out of it!  We traveled to Virginia to see more of our best friends (The Henry Family), spent the day in DC looking at historic monuments, and then finished the trip with several days in New York.  My parents met up with us in New York and we had such a great time!  Traveling with 4 kids is never easy, so having a set of grandparents made the trip much more enjoyable for us all!  The girls looked precious in their flower girl dresses, and the wedding was a beautiful ending to our trip!  

Adopted 8 Chickens
Our trip to Virginia to see the Henry family (mentioned above) sparked Kevin's interest in getting chickens.  Our friends had 5 or 6 chickens and my friend Sarah cooked some fresh scrambled eggs for us for breakfast one morning.  Kevin was sold and kept saying we were getting chickens when we got back home and I didn't give it much thought... but when we got home, he was seriously wanting chickens.  I agreed as long as he agreed to take 100% care of them.  And he did.  So on our 8th wedding anniversary, he brought home 8 little chicks... 4 ISA browns, and 4 Rhode Island Reds.  He took great care of them, built them a lavish chicken coop (with my input on a few things), and they are still thriving.  The kids have fallen in love with them, and I have fallen in love with the fresh eggs daily.  I also love taking my scraps out to them daily, and they look forward to it too!  They eat like pigs, and are the happiest chickens I've ever known.  We have plans to add to our flock this coming spring and we're already looking forward to it!

Adopted Charlie
At the years end last year, I contacted a local Maine Coon breeder about a new littler of kittens that were born on 12/30/14.  I expressed my interest in an orange kitty, but it was a couple weeks into January when I heard from her.  She had one orange kitten out of the 7 that were born, and she was willing to let me adopt him.  I couldn't reply fast enough that YES, we'd take him!  I inquired about visiting him, and the breeder thought I was a bit nutso (my words, not hers) and we just agreed I could pick him up when he was 11 weeks old.  I watched him grow week after week from the pictures she'd send me.  In early March he was ready to come home.  He was the cutest, sweetest, softest, most playful kitten I'd ever been around.  I love this cat so much!   The kids love this cat so much!  Even when hes really rotten (and knocks over every drink he finds, and attacks my feet in the middle of the night, and pesters Harry till he cries) I wouldn't trade him for the world.

Privacy Fence
While we were on our East Coast vacation, we had a cedar privacy fence put up.  We were having problems keeping our dog, CeCe, in our yard, and I loved the idea of containing the kids to one place.  I convinced Kevin that the fence was a good idea, and hiring someone to do it would be an even better idea.  We spent our entire tax refund check on it, but we will both tell you it was the best money we've ever invested in our house.  We love being able to send the kids safely out back to play, we love that we are able to keep CeCe in our yard, and we can let our chickens free range often (when the dog is put up!).  Kevin likes to say, "I'm so glad I talked you into getting that fence..." and I just nod and agree.  ;)

Trip to Destin
Right after school started, we took a week long vacation to Destin, Florida with Kevin's parents.  We stayed in an amazing condo that was a 2 minute walk to our private beach.  We ate at delicious restaurants, we zip lined, we shopped,  we cooked a lot in the condo, the kids put on shows for us, I took lots of pictures, we went swimming, and the boys went fishing.  It was just an all around great trip that I was so glad we were able to take. 

Our 1st Garden/Harvest
We were late in planting our 1st garden.  I was a total beginner to gardening, and still am really.  Kevin built me some raised beds and I picked up some seeds and planted them.  My tomato and pepper seeds that I planted early never did anything.  My yellow squash took off and did so well.  The cucucmbers did good too!  I didn't have the patience to let my carrots grow and I ended up pulling them early and feeding them to the chickens.  We hope to do a bigger garden this year, and plant it earlier so we can get a bigger, better harvest.  It was so much fun and so rewarding for us all.

Hayden Repeating 1st Grade
This was actually one of my hardest decisions of the year, but God was so good in affirming this decision in more ways than I could even dream up.  Hayden was not enthusiastic about 2nd grade - even though he loved his teacher, he always felt behind, he lacked all motivation to be a good student, and I was at my wits end trying to figure out what else I could do.  I remember telling him if he wasn't trying, he'd have to repeat 2nd grade next year.  That's when the wheels started spinning, that maybe I should just plan on holding him back at the year-end and not let him go to 3rd grade next year.  And then I started thinking about the areas he was struggling and how most of those things should have been worked out in 1st grade (slow reading, letter reverals, poor handwriting).  That's when I talked to Kevin about putting him back in 1st grade.  Hayden was able to go back to the original teacher he was assigned to on his 1st day of 1st grade, Mrs. Boris, and he was thrilled to be back in her class.  His 2nd grade class and his new 1st grade class had lunch and recess together so he was still able to see all of his friends he'd made this year.  The school staff was so supportive of our decision, which was totally unexpected.  As parents, we were so confident in this move that it made him so confident in the move, and it was a beautiful thing to watch unfold!  Hayden is a leader in his class this year.  He's excelling at everything he once struggled with and his effort is through the roof.  We couldn't be more proud of him.


And no year would be complete without the bad too... Kevin's brother unexpectedly passed away, Austin got hand/foot/mouth days before we left for Florida, Hayden had a bad bike accident, money was tight when the fridge went out and when my van needed new tires.  There were growing pains, fevers, stomach bugs, and pink eyes.  Marriage provided plenty of "growth opportunities" while we argued and disagreed, but always came back together.  I like remembering the good times more than the bad, but the mix of both is what makes this family of mine mean so much to me.  We love each other.  We are here for each other.  We support each other the best we know how.  Kevin, and these kids... I can't even put into words how they fill every ounce of my heart.

Looking forward to writing about all the blessings/adventure/and good times this next year brings! 

It's Time for a Change

I've grown to love the idea of a new year.  When I was younger, it just meant staying up till midnight, maybe going to a NYE party, but it was no big deal.  As I get older, I feel like it's a great time to assess the past year, and make new goals for the new year.  I laughed looking back at my 2014 resolutions.  When I wrote that, I was thinking, "If I get most of this stuff done, I'll really have it together."  Reality is that I accomplished about 1/3 of that list, and had I been able to cross everything off my list, that alone wouldn't have been the scale to base whether or not my year was successful/happy/good.  I'm learning. 

Earlier this month, a friend, who is my christian mentor, posed this question to me, "Who is Haley, other than a mom?"  I really didn't know how to answer that.  Every part of my being has been consumed by this one role in my life.  When we dove in to the subject further, I began to see how I was substituting areas in my life {that could bring great value} for artificial things.  This friend asked me when do I take time for myself, to hang out with my friends, and to do things I enjoy.  I really had to think about it because none of that happens often.  She suggested I've let social media  (because it is a quick way to stay in touch with lots of people) substitute real one on one time with friends.  As much as I hated to admit that, it's true.  I used the excuse I didn't have time to get out, it was hard with all the kids, Kevin's work schedule never synced well with friendly get-togethers, so albeit, I accepted "keeping up" with people for real friendship.  I'm taking social media out of the picture for an indefinite amount of time this year to force myself to make real friendships and take care of existing friendships.  Progress.

I also have a 100% record of making best friends that move away.  It's inevitable that distance makes the friendship distant too, or that's the way it has always seemed to be.  Instead of making another friend that would eventually move away, I stuck with my pattern of staying at home and did what's comfortable.  I'm happy to report that in the first 3 months of the year, I'll be seeing 3 of my best friends that have moved away.  Progress.

When I have free time at night (or during naps), I'll waste the time looking at magazines, watching tv, or browsing some of the apps on my phone (pinterest, craigslist, or the internet).  I say wasting time because I get nothing out of it.  It occupies my mind for the time being, but it doesn't feed my soul.  I understand not every second of my day has to be productive and my body and mind need time to rest, but I want to challenge myself this new year to use some of that down time to work on hobbies I enjoy.

Looking back to who I saw myself as before I had kids, I use to take pride in my appearance.  It's debatable whether that pride was unhealthy and artificial, but lately I've grown comfortable with the dirty pony tail and pjs look.  10 years ago you wouldn't have caught me ever looking that way for very long.  I want to make myself physically and emotionally healthy and stronger.  I don't want  to feel guilty about spending time to get myself ready.  That may mean sacrificing sleep on my end, but I don't want to be a frumpy mom that blames my frumpiness on having kids.  My kids are four of the best blessings I've ever received, so I want that reflected by the way I look, the way I talk, the way I carry myself, and the way I do every day life. 

Here are more substituions I've made...

• Well thought out meals and healthy foods --> Quick, easy, fast food that quickly gets expensive as a result of little to no planning
• A marriage that connects us spiritually, physically, and emotionally --> If we aren't arguing then everything is fine
• Plan for the day and be intentional -->  Keep everyone happy, and just keep going
• Daily quiet time --> A quick daily devotion is enough
• Being true to myself and the way God has wired me --> Trying to fit in and be accepted just for the sake of trying to receive someones approval
• Having a parenting plan --> Just trying to make it through the day

Please tell me you can relate with one of those.  I feel like I'm learning a lot about me, about what I want my life to look like, and what changes I need to make in order for me to live according to the purpose I was created for. 

2014 has made me aware, and I'm hoping 2015 can be a year when I start changing these things mentioned above.  I'm not going to get it perfect, ever, and I know that.  But I do know I can do a better job.  I can be a better Haley, which will make me a better wife, and a cooler mom (Hayden told me over Christmas break I was a cool mom ha!)  To wrap it up, my favorite Christmas gift this year was my new watch.  I really had no intentions of getting a watch, but I saw it, I loved it, and that old spontaneous Haley disregarded the price tag and thought it would be a great symbol to remind me that "It's time for a change".

Happy New Year to you!

Goals for 2014

Several weeks ago I started thinking about goals I had for the new year.  Usually I don't give it any thought, but this year I kept thinking of so many goals I decided to write them down.  I'm hoping to refer back to my list throughout the year to keep myself accountable and on track!

I made a summary statement of my goals.... so if someone asked, "What's your New Years Resolution?", this would be my answer.

"Truly enjoy my day by:  serving my husband, kids, and others, planning 

ahead, using the creative skills I've been given, being intentional, 

being consistent, and constantly working towards being my best self." 

Here's my list in no particular order.

• Make daily quiet time a priority.  I know this will be a challenge because it will require me to wake up before the kids, which I normally don't do!  I want to start my day with bible reading, praying, and making a list of things to do for the day.  Anytime I start my day this way, I feel very on top of things!
• Be more flexible, work on low expectations, be more gracious, and keep focused on my own thoughts {Rather than peoples opinions that I can't control}.  This will be quite the undertaking.  I get in my routine, have (high) expectations, and get really frustrated and disappointed when things don't go the way I had envisioned.  I don't want to get easily bent out of shape, or expect more from someone than they can give.  I want Kevin and the kids to be able to see the difference in me.  If I'm constantly looking for things to be thankful for, I think all of this will fall into place (or is that my high expectations again?). 
• Make it a priority to have a monthly date night.  Being at home with the kids all day, every day, sometimes makes me forget I'm a wife too, and that I need to put energy and thought into that relationship more than any other.  When Kevin and I are both happy, life works so much better! 
• Be more intentional with the kids.  Holidays pass, seasons pass, and I look back and think I wish I would have done more.  (I know it's impossible to escape the "mommy guilt".)  I want to plan ahead, prepare things that the kids will enjoy, and make the most out of my time at home with them.  I want to encourage and help them to follow interests they have (sports, hobbies, etc.)
• Take a family vacation.  This isn't set it stone, but we've already picked out a condo and a time of the year when we want to head south.  I know it will be a lot of work, but I feel like the memories will make up for the stress. 
• Make my first quilt.  I bought a book with a quilting pattern in it that I love.  I don't want to start small, I want to go all out.  I really want to make one quilt every year from now until I can no longer see or use my hands!  My kids all want a new quilt for their beds too, so if #1 goes well, maybe I'll start on those this year too.
• Sew and hang curtains in every room of our house.  I want the house to feel more "homey" and this is one thing I've been wanting to do for awhile.  I have pinned several ideas for curtains.  This is a very do-able task, and I really think it will help soften the look of each room, so this is high on my priority list!
• Hang more pictures throughout the house.  There's nothing that makes a house feel like home more than pictures!  We have a little photo collage in our family room, and some random pictures hung up here and there, but I want twice as many pictures hanging up than what I currently have!  I LOVE the command velcro strips for hanging pictures and plan on using those.  
• Keep up with housework.  I'm typing this while I still have the "nesting" instinct.  I don't ever want that feeling to leave me.  My goals for housework are:  don't go to bed with dishes in the sink, do laundry weekly, clean up toys e-v-e-r-y single night (the kids do 75% of the work, so I need to hold them accountable), vacuum daily,  and keep my counter top cleaned off.  This has been the norm the last 6 weeks.  We all love waking up to, coming home to, and spending time in a relatively clean and organized home.  
• Work on curb appeal.  I know there are far more important things in life than what the outside of your house looks like, but with that being said, I also don't like the front of our house looking like the entrance to the local dump.  Step #1 is to get CeCe's electric fence moved to the back yard (so she can't keep dragging branches up front and shredding toys and doggy jackets all over our front yard).  Step #2 is to get our front landscape done.  We laid stone last summer, and CeCe has helped dig up a few blocks.  We want to get some weed barrier down and plants planted.  Step #3 is painting our front door and shutters.  We need more color out front!
• Work on being frugal.  Kevin is very supportive of starting a garden!  I know this would cut down our food bill, and I think the kids would love to watch all the plants grow.  Kevin also wants to fish and hunt more to provide some of our protein throughout the year (this is sooooo not up my alley, but I maybe will try to go along with it, as long as I'm not gutting or filleting anything).  I also want to keep thrift shopping and yard sale shopping any chance I get. 
• Be a better budgeter.  This plays along with the previous goal.  We (I'm sure like you) have things come up constantly every single month.  I want to start budgeting things like doctor expenses, house and car maintenance, while working on building up a savings.  (We would love to add on to our house in a few years!)
• Decorate a cake for every kid's birthday this year.  Again with my high expectations, but cupcakes just don't cut it for me.  I've felt guilty that I didn't have a rockin' cake for each kids birthday this year.  If I plan ahead there's no reason why this wouldn't be totally doable.  It's a hobby I love, and I don't want to neglect it. 
• Meal plan by the month.  I use to do this, and it was wonderful.  Right now, I just create a weekly plan.  Every Thursday I dread trying to think of what to make for the next week.  By doing it monthly, I eliminate the weekly headache.  It usually takes me a solid day to create the monthly meal plan, but I like the idea of only having to think about it once a month!  I'll probably try to start this in February since I expect January to be a bit chaotic.  
• Keep my mantle/fireplace decorated.  I will be sad to take down my Christmas decorations.  My house feels so much cozier with the mantle and fireplace decorated.  I don't usually put much money into decorations for the house, so I'll have to come up with creative ways to decorate that won't break the bank.  I'd love to decorate for seasons and holidays to help keep the cozy feel!
• Get caught up on scrapbooks.  Krissy's one year album should be done by now, and I haven't even started.  I only plan on doing each kiddo's first year, so I'm not that behind, but I want to start and finish Krissy's album and keep up with Austin's album as the year goes on.  
• Make and deliver more meals.  I feel like this is one practical way I can serve others outside of my family.  Friends are always having babies or going through hard times, and I want to be better about stepping up and easing a burden (figuring out what's for dinner really can be a burden when you are preoccupied with other things).

That's a long list!  I'm not going to beat myself up if I don't accomplish everything on this list come December 31, 2014, but I like that I have a reference point.  I like that I'll be able to check back and say, "The year is half way over and I've accomplished XY&Z."  I'm hoping that in the years ahead, I'll keep creating a list of goals for myself.

Happy New Year to you and your family!